We're doing this!!!
We always knew we would be parents but never imagined it would be this hard.
There are only a few people who KNOW everything I’m about to share with you. However, in honor of this journey we are about to embark on, we want to invite you into our story.
Here we go!
Joseph and I have been friends since we were freshmen in high school; we have shared a ton of life experiences and we are always there to support one another. Our story though, is not a high school sweethearts’ story, but rather an, “It’s amazing we ended up here” story! You see, we never intended to date, let alone get married. Isn’t it funny where life takes us? But in early 2007, after many late night talks, we realized this was “it” … THE BIG “IT”. We belonged together. It was like the light bulb went on: we were each other’s ONE! Within 11 months we were engaged and married. As Joe would say: “Stand back I got this!”
Just like any other young married couple, we just assumed we would get pregnant and have children. Unfortunately, that wasn’t the case and still isn’t. The thought that we would be entrusted with life’s great gift, LIFE, is one of the most humbling and honoring experiences. To have that not be the case tests who you are. And more accurately, for Joe and I, it has redefined who we are and who we will be. We have learned much about trust, gratitude, perseverance, anger, resoluteness, disappointment, and the likes thereof.
Let’s take a deep and intimate dive into our story.
In 2009 I went to the doctor for my annual checkup and left with a crushing blow, the type of blow that leaves you down for the count. “You have polycystic ovarian syndrome (PCOS) and your risk of infertility is very high.” For those who don’t know what PCOS is, they are cysts or polyps on the ovaries that affect a multitude of things. One of the symptoms being the ability to conceive.
My 22-year-old self just blew it off and figured that somehow it would all work out, no big deal. So, like any healthy human being would do, I moved on quickly and occupied my time with working hard to ignore the lack. To be uncomfortably vulnerable with you, we were successful at conceiving once, but lost that sweet baby very early on. In the years after my diagnosis I experienced many emotions: blind faith that I would become pregnant followed by a little disappointment that gave way to the injustice of others conceiving while we remained in a state of lack. Eventually we land in the place of understanding that this is our carved out path, that we have been entrusted to walk out well. We trust God and the truth is He’s never left us.
At the end of 2013, we decided it was time for a change and moved from our home state of Florida to Texas. We needed this. We needed to find a place to call our own and a place to establish what our family would look like. I am entirely grateful for all the years spent in Florida and the life we created there. This move to Texas was what we needed to healthily embark on the next part of our journey. So we did it. We packed up all we could fit into our little Ford Escape, and we went for it. Texas embraced us with open arms and it has been an amazing place to set down roots.
Our current place in our “future parents” journey is starting the adoption process. While we would love to have biological children, we’re just not there right now, and the truth of the matter is that there is a child that has been chosen for us that won’t grow inside me but in another incredible woman and we will have the privilege of taking care of him/her. We have been chosen to walk this path, and we will do it well.
The one thing I am sure of, is this – our family will look like God’s family: a little different, with a variety of races and cultures that will radiate beauty.
Please know that through the process, our hearts remain confident in Him, the Creator and we thrilled to partner with Him, the Because of Isaac crew, and our tribe on this journey.
Joseph & Carrie Alford
An ending Disclaimer: Please don’t feel bad or sorry for us or the thousands of others who walk a similar path. Rather, we hope you have been moved with compassion to pray for those with struggles in this area and give where you can.
To support our adoption journey financially, click here.